Releasing Judgment

Back to share a little of what has been on my mind. I have fallen behind on physically posting in here but mentally I have been blogging quite a bit. What do I mean by that? Energetically many things come to me to share and even when I can’t get to the computer to sit down and share them I mentally see myself typing them into the blog. For me this gets the energy out into the world and helps to always be creating content. The reason I am sharing that is because we are so quick to judge ourselves for falling off on things we start. We may have good intentions but life happens and we are not always able to follow through with these things in the way we intended to. As I have been working on my self-judgement for quite some time now I use this as a way to help myself move out of judgment over not being able to get to something each and every day or even as frequently as I would like to. This does not mean that I give up on the thing entirely but I allow myself grace to do what feels right on my path to creating new rituals and habits without all the pressure and self-judgement. The same holds true for my gratitude practice. Over the years I have fallen off and on the train of having a daily gratitude practice of journaling and just reflection on my day. This past summer I committed to really embracing this practice as an act of self-love and even though a lot of this time I am able to follow through on it there are days when I am just too tired or too rushed and I cannot follow through with my commitment. However I will connect to the energy of gratitude even if I cannot physically connect with writing in my journal. Saying what I am grateful for out loud to myself or sharing how grateful I am for those around me, for my husband, for my life. Recognizing that in every moment, even the sad ones, there is always something to be grateful for. So love yourself , let go of perfection and judgement and meet yourself where you are at. Know that with each new habit or ritual we wish to create it takes time and we don’t have to judge ourselves for not getting right each and every day. Offer yourself grace and compassion and meet each day with intention. Things will shift and change will happen but we don’t need to stress ourselves out along the way, especially with things that are supposed to be bringing joy into our lives. I am grateful for you, grateful that you are here reading this and I know you are capable of brining whatever you wish into your life. If you ever need help along the way feel free to reach out.

All my love,

Why Aerial Yoga?

I wanted to share with you my aerial yoga journey in hopes that it will offer you some insight on why I love it and what it has done for me. Having been a dancer since the age of 4 and having taught dance since 1999 movement is all I have even really known. Around the time I turned 10 my mother decided to start training in aerobics which led to her opening her own studio when I was about 14 or 15. As part of the studio she brought in a yoga teacher and out of curiosity I began taking classes with her. I had never been exposed to visual tools and breath work for releasing stress and tension so I found it all so helpful and interesting, especially as a stressed out teenager. The stretching reminded me of my dance training and definitely helped me to grow as a dancer. Eventually the instructor moved away and as I grew older yoga continued to call to me and I tried to find a class that reminded me of my first experience with it. When I moved to Texas I the early 2000’s I searched for yoga classes and tried a few but nothing felt the same way as it had previously. When I came back to NEPA a few years later yoga was still a relatively new thing in the area and I still wasn’t finding what I was looking for. I began learning about the Nia Technique in 2009 and started taking classes from home through DVD’s. This opened up a new outlet for me and eventually let to training to become an instructor in 2011. Nia helped me to bridge the gap between worlds fusing dance, martial arts and yoga together. It filled me in those areas for many years and connected me back to my love of movement and child-like play but as time went on I was aching for something else. Something to connect me to aspects of myself that had not yet been explored and were calling for me to come out of my comfort zone. In 2017 after looking and talking myself out of trying Aerial Yoga for about a year I finally took my first class. It was not the magical experience I had hoped it would be and I often tell everyone that my first class was quite traumatic. I had a lot of apprehension and fear around inverting or doing things that felt like tricks, the whole process was new to me and instead of moving through poses we simply played on the hammocks doing any and all possible things that one could do in an open level aerial yoga class. This or course did not ease my fears and only made everything worse. I returned to my car after class and cried the whole way home because I felt defeated. It took me about 3 months to return because I simply could not get it out of my head. It felt like something I needed to do for myself and so I followed where I was being guided and each time it got better. Each class I felt stronger and more confident and before I knew it I was there 4 times a week and a year in decided to become a teacher. That is not to say that I knew everything at that point because I definitely did not and still do not. It wasn’t about perfection it was about sharing what this practice did for me and how I wanted to help others find that too. Now what changed for me from my first experience to then? I realized that the fear that had bubbled to the surface was exactly what was holding me back and that I was ready to let it go, to become this next version of myself. I not only gained strength from aerial yoga I gained confidence. I could see how conquering fears in class was mirrored in my life. I began speaking up for myself, feeling stronger in who I was as a person. This practice brought me back to myself and made me feel whole again. I have been able to carry my experience with me into my classes. Attending to my students with love and compassion, recognizing what they need in the moment and being there to cheer them on as they conquer their own fears and grow stronger. Remember what you seek is seeking you and if you are feeling called to something there is a reason. Follow your inner compass and trust that your heart knows the way to what you need. This holds true for anything that we are called to. You came here for a reason with your own desires and strengths. Let them guide you on your journey and if you feel called to join us in our sanctuary we will be here to support you fully, all my love!

LoveABLE

I have not been able to put this book down since it arrived in the shop! Love’ABLE’ is an amazing memoir of a woman coming into her own and choosing to stop people pleasing and allow herself to be free of all its heaviness. Letting go of the good girl vs bad girl scenario that plagued her whole life and following her own heart despite what others may think. Having gone through a similar situation myself that was steeped in beliefs and trauma from my childhood I absolutely can relate to Amber’s writing. We often have no idea how much our mind and body try to protect us when we feel unsafe as a child and how that can shape our subconscious beliefs as adults. We create scenarios and memories of what happened to us that make us feel as if we had control over our situations and were able to protect ourselves however this is not the reality once we actually start to let ourselves fully process these situations. Coming back into wholeness with who we actually are as opposed to what the outside world has placed upon us. Letting go so that our inner child can feel safe with us knowing that we can now give ourselves what we did not receive when we were young.

I would also like to recognize her bringing to light what I have also said in the past. Our society makes us grow up thinking that dysfunctional marriages are better than no marriage at all or divorcing and re-marrying (especially when their are children involved) but I can attest through my own personal experience as well as Amber’s that this is simply not true. When we let go of a relationship that has run its course we not only open ourselves up to the next part of our journey but we do the same for our partner. Allowing each person to find what is meant them and allowing our children to see healthy dynamics between partners that we want for them in the future. It is time for us to re-evaluate old societal beliefs to question what feels right for us not just blindly following along with “the way things have always been.” Stop yourself when you find that you are falling into these holes and ask yourself- “does this feel right to me?” If the answer is not that’s all you need. You are not responsible for others beliefs about your life. It’s your life not theirs. You are the main character in this book and you get to decide how you write the story, not society.

All my love,

Back to blogging

Hello all! I have decided to bring my blog back after a long hiatus. This feels like the next step forward to me in a return to some of our older ways of communicating. I know that right now the world feels heavy and confusing so I’d like a way to share what’s on my heart and hopefully offer some insights into all the shifts and changes we are experiencing right now.

My goal here at Mystick Mermaid and even with this blog is to offer a safe haven from everything and give us all a place to come back home to ourselves and our hearts. It can be difficult to not get swept up in all the sadness that seems to surround us each day but know that there is always something to be thankful for and that there is still SO much light and love in the world. If you are in need of a sanctuary, a place to rest your head and your body know that we are here for you today and always. I am hoping that by opening this blog back up that we can begin a conversation and help each other navigate our ever changing world together.

All my love,